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Is child care bad for my 1 year old?
After watching a TV show on SBS on child care last night I'm worried and confused about my 1yr old being in care. Many commented that 2 was the best age.
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by liz on -
Hi, I also saw the program. Remember they also said the quality of care makes a huge difference. As well as it being a long day as opposed to shorter hours.
Personally I think if you find a good carer then you will be fine. I think my 17 month old gets more out of childcare than she would being at home with me every day. She has more social contact with other kids, plays different games and learns more and does things she wouldnt normally do with me. She's been going since she was 10 month old, two days a week to family day care. Plus I get a bit of a break even though I'm at work. i hate leaving her there and still get mother guilt but I think she's gained more being there than she has lost.
If you are unsure, hang out with your bub at your chosen care for awhile and get a feel for the place. If you still feel uneasy then you know it isn't right for right now.
Can you afford to not put your baby into care till he/she is 2?
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Permalink Reply by mommaof2e on -
hi worried
i can understand what you are feeling cos i'm feeling the same way myself! i am just about to start my 10mth old girl childcare as my inlaws are unable to care for her anymore (their visa has expired and they have to leave the country)
i feel terrible that i have to send her to childcare at such a young age, but we dont really have a choice do we? just hope n pray that we find the right centre for them with lots of love n care given. my baby is an especially difficult one too. she cries most of the time as she always wants to be carried, and even at 10 mths old, she isn't crawling at all. and she's such a terrible napper - doesnt go down for more than 30 min. i'm really worried about how the carers will handle her when she's there :(
anyway i thought of family day care as well, but since i have a son who's 2 yrs old at childcare, it would certainly be easier for me to drop them both off rather than shuttle between 2 different places in the morning which i'm sure would make me late for work everyday :P
what is the reason for u needing to send her to childcare anyway? is there no other option? for me, we're both working full time hence the kids have to go to childcare!
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Permalink Reply by christiane on -
amen liz
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Permalink Reply by snez's Family Day Care on
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just keep in mind the older the child the harder it is for them to transition.
Try family day care...
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Permalink Reply by Lilysmumma on -
My daughter went into family day care 3 days a week when she was 10 months. She is far more advanced than her peers in regards to talking, motor skills, and most other developmental milestones. I think the interaction with other children of a variety of ages & backgrounds gives her far more benefits than being at home with me. She get's spoilt by her day care mum & has access to a much wider variety of toys I could ever buy let alone store.
She is about to turn two & next year start pre-school. She is a well behaved child who respects her peers and elders. It takes a community to raise a child, you can't keep them wrapped up in cotton wool. What sort of adult would they become?
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Permalink Reply by Mrs Cash on
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I am also worried about this because I am about to go back to work and put my 18 month old into childcare 5 days a week. I am concerned that I am being selfish wanting to go back to work...but on the other hand I had to get counselling to cope with being a full time mum because I was grieving my social life and work life/identity so much. Surely a happy working mum is better than an unhappy stay home mum....
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Permalink Reply by Angel on -
Oh I know what you mean..my daughter was 2months premmie,so was really small compared to the other kids at childcare...so I was beside myself when the time finally came for me to have to return to work.my partner had to console me the night before she was going to start as I literally cried myself to sleep with guilt and worry...my onlysaviour was the girls at the centre were fabulous,caring and supportive. I was able to take her for the week before she started to enable her to get used to the girls and everything, it was the best thing,it wasnt easy,especially the first week when she would cry when I left, many a time I was in tears myself, but I couldnt let her see that..Now she is thriving, loves all the girls,plays great with the kids and is learning new things...She gets so excited when we ring the bell,it makes me feel that its ok...Hang in there!!
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Permalink Reply by Suzy on -
I saw that show and was really angry that they didn't talk much at all about the benefits of child care. I'm with Mrs. Cash and think that a happy working mum is much healthier for her children than a depressed stay at home mum! My daughter has a great time at child-care, they do things with her that I would never be bothered doing and she gets to socialise and learn sharing and manners etc. She is only 2 and a 1/2 but people say she seems so much older, as she is very confident and sociable - she's been in care since 20 months. If you want/need to work, enjoy it! Your child is being looked after in a system that is of the highest quality in the world! He/she will be learning to take part in a society that is incredibly sociable and relationaship based - the skills for coping will develop and help them to become resilient children and adults!
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Permalink Reply by Natalie Whincup on
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I am a Family Day Carer and through experience I have noticed that at this age they do become clingy and the separation part is difficult. But the one thing that helped me was the fact that I could meet the lady, sit with them and see if I felt comfortable with her (as well as my son). It does help immensley if you can take the time at this age to ease them into Care (either by taking them to play alternate days for the first week say for an hour an increasing the time until they are happy to play away from you for longer periods of time.
So if you do have to take your child to care (choose wisely). I know first hand that there are hardly any places in Family Day Care (as I get calls all the time for care and I feel bad knowing that I cannot help them). But it pays (if you have the time to do it) to look around and go to the carers house, see where they allow the children to play (inside and outside) and whether that is enough room to move. See how the carer interacts with the other children and what they do if a conflict arises. How is her tone with the other children. Does your child feel comfortable around her. What ages are the children that will be there when you want your child to go.
Trust me, 95% of the time you will know (like gut instinct or mothers intuition) whether you are comfortable with a carer when you meet them.
It can be the most safe, nuturing and loving enviroment your child would be in (other than with his mum).
Most carers (like myself) will allow you to come as often and for as long as you like until both of you are comfortable. Also, we can take video's and photo's of child while in care (via phone) and send them to you to show that they are doing fine during the day.
Remember they will be sad when you drop them off at the start but the more you can ease them into the experience the less stressful it is for both you and your child.
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Permalink Reply by home is where the heart is ... on -
the childcare model has been said to link to ancient tribal systems of collective care, but that was for survival, contemporary childcare is for profit, extracted by either cost cutting or financial dishonesty (incompetency). home is where the heart is. if you need child care, try looking to form or join a group that can share the care. there are some around who have evolved out of playgroups. take turns caring for small groups of kids in your home. there is much to be gained from home truths. you are your child's best carer. no-one else can do it better than you - believe it!!!
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Permalink Reply by home is where the heart is ... on
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children cry because they feel they are being abandoned. they stop over time because they are resigned to abandonment, not because they are getting use to it!!! Parents get used to it because they eventually suppress their natural compulsions to care for their children. Be your child's best carer. when they're older, they'll be better equipped for being held, for being loved, not for a high-cost exclusive education or a big house.
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Permalink Reply by liz on
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home is where the heart is ... said:the childcare model has been said to link to ancient tribal systems of collective care, but that was for survival, contemporary childcare is for profit, extracted by either cost cutting or financial dishonesty (incompetency). home is where the heart is. if you need child care, try looking to form or join a group that can share the care. there are some around who have evolved out of playgroups. take turns caring for small groups of kids in your home. there is much to be gained from home truths. you are your child's best carer. no-one else can do it better than you - believe it!!!
ahem - look up family day care. same thing.
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